Friends!
The answer to the gender of the co-worker I was talking to in my previous post was--
A man!
I am blessed to work in a great place. We are indoctrinated endlessly with political correctness classes, which we all (mostly) attend and choose to ignore. There's a general consensus that we're all adults here, and we'll say what we want, including telling somebody off if they make us mad. So I wasn't threatened or demeaned or anything by a compliment, I took it at face value; this particular person thought I'd look good in a bikini. Period.
I'm 48, and I grew up on the cusp of women's lib. My Mom refused to quit her job at a department store when she started "showing" during her pregnancy with me, and after I was born, she worked evenings and my Dad did the parenting. I'll never forget our fish stick TV dinners with French dressing on the fish, and Dad trying to coax me to eat the peas. I watched my Mom go to college and have a career, and later earn her Master's degree. So I had good role-sharing models growing up, at our house there weren't any gender based work assignments. Although my Mom was (and is) the cleaning fiend of the two.
We watched a lot of public television at my house, and back in the 70's that meant NOVA and other science-based shows. In school, I gravitated towards geeky classes like chemistry and Latin. It's funny now, the dichotomy of me--I was a good student and loved learning, yet I was, *ahem* a wild child. Which meant I spent a lot of time with the male sex. Actually, I've always had more male friends than female; in fact, blogging is the first time I've ever connected with so many women! In person I gravitate to men, and it's not a sexual thing. I simply find them interesting, perhaps since they're fairly transparent. WYSIWYG's. I feel more comfortable in a room full of men versus a room full of women.
Which is not a bad thing when you major in biochemistry in college, because often I was the lone female in ANY of my classes. I had a professor tell me that women didn't belong in science. Jerk. I got an "A" in his class.
But back to my work environment. It's mostly guys. The first couple of months were spent establishing personal boundaries, which was refreshingly addressed by outright asking me would I be insulted by thus and such. Of course not, but it was polite to ask, and if I had girl things to talk about I did the same. It's that way for everybody here. Some of us have encountered discrimination; me in school, or racial bias, or age. It makes for interesting discussions--two days a week I work with a guy who remembers having to drink out of "Colored" water fountains in California and going to segregated schools. Mainly we talk about sports, he knows every player on every team (ever!) and we have a great time on shift. And it's the same with the rest of the crew. Sometimes, a girl in a bikini is just a girl in a bikini.
By the way, if you know a really good dirty joke, I'd love to hear it.
xx
trish
6 comments:
I figured it would be a male who gave you the compliment. You have a great, easy-going workplace, and while we're all politically incorrect in our small office, none of the men would make a remark like that. Mind you, it's only 3 middle-aged men, me and a slightly younger woman in our office. I've complimented clothes (great shirt--nice colour, etc.) but that's it. Mind you, remember I work at a university, and while we're not an academic department, the look is pretty typical. LOL.
I always thought I got on more with the male section of any workplace I work in but recently - it's been pretty even. At the moment I have very prickly relations with all my managers (2 males, 2 females)and am only genuinely friendly with 4 males and 4 females!
My mum would have been amazon queen in a different life - she's that strong and independent. Yet she is very old fashioned and extremely conventional at heart. Weird!
Now for SEX! LOL! Take care
x
I agree I always preferred to work around/with men, and most of my career it was mainly men.
The 'colored' water comment caught my attention. I grew up in the South -- through all the segregation and angst. I remember seeing colored water fountains and wanting to see the colored water as a child.
xoxoxox
We are so much alike it's scary! Including gravitating to men because that's who I have worked with and that's the typical in my profession..males. I am a girly girl though but tough as nails. You and I liked-- and still do much the same things. I love my women friends but I was late getting any real ones that went past casual. Now I have several who are very dear to me. They are also strong women..one's I met through my career. I sure do get along with the guys still. Raised by a Dad and 2 brothers..just comfortable around them and my hobbies are largely those which men tend toward. TMI. :-)
Me too! Actually, when I was younger it was alway 'catty' with the women which is why I prefered the guys. You're so right, men are very transparent (and some of them needed to be reminded that we were there to earn a living not find a sex partner). I've always been of the mind that we were all just humans and I didn't need to back stab anyone like most of the women I worked with. I found that when I started working with more mature women we did actually become friends.
Well, that's interesting. Where I work, it would be highly unlikely that a man would have said a comment like that to me. But I do work with attorneys...'nuf said!
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