The Psychiatrist & The Proctologist

The Psychiatrist & The Proctologist

Best friends graduated from medical school at the same time and
decided that, in spite of two different specialties, they would open a
practice together to share office space and personnel.

Dr. Smith was the psychiatrist and Dr. Jones was the proctologist;they
put up a sign reading:
"Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones: Hysterias and Posteriors".
The town council was livid and insisted they change it.

So, the docs changed it to read: "Schizoids and Hemorrhoids" which was
also not acceptable, so they again changed the sign.
"Catatonics and High Colonics" - No go. Next, they tried "Manic Depressives
and Anal Retentives" - thumbs down again. Then came "Minds and Behinds" -
still no good. Another attempt resulted in "Lost Souls and Butt Holes"
- unacceptable again!
So they tried "Analysis and AnalCysts" - not a chance. "Nuts and
Butts" - no way.
"Freaks and Cheeks" - still no good. "Loons and Moons" - forget it.
Almost at their wit's end, the docs finally came up with:
"Dr. Smith and Dr. Jones - Specializing in Odds and Ends". Everyone loved it.

Constipated?

Friends!

I want to show you some fun work stuff.

Let me introduce to you the World's Worst Coffee, guaranteed to rot your gut and clean you out.  This crap must be government surplus coffee from the 30's, it's THAT bad.

And people drink it by the gallon, mainly because it's free.Dysentery is free, too, but you don't see folks lining up for that...

I bring a cup from home.

::bowels doing happy dance::

XX. Trish

A new method

Test

Friends!

I am gonna try to be better about posting now that I have my new phone...now to figure out adding photos!

Trish. XX

I know I'm Bats but--REALLY!?!

Friends!

So, I'm at work this morning, out and about, getting samples for some lab work.  I opened the door to one of the pumping plants and almost stained my shorts when this tiny object fluttered out!  It was a Little Brown Bat.

I bet he passed a little guano, too.

He flittered down to the ground and of course my first thought was: PICTURES!

He was SO tiny and light, and his fur was silky soft.

He had translucent fuzzy wings.

Check out those tiny toes!  They were surprisingly strong.

I didn't get a photo, but when he opened his mouth I saw his teeny-weeny fangs!  Don't worry, he didn't want to drink my blood, Little Brown Bats eat insects.  In fact, there are several bat houses on the property.

He flew off after a few minutes, no doubt cussing me out for disturbing his nap.

xx

trish

Back to Work.

Friends!

You all made me weep.  Shame on you!

Thank you for you encouraging words, love and experiences. I am honored.

 I had three days off from work and indulged in an orgy of cleaning and organization, something I find very Zen and in-the-moment to do.  If I can't have ordered inner space at least my outer space is going to be spic-n-span, dammit.

I don't feel any better, but I'm not any worse.  Holding is good.

And I have some most excellent medicine to ingest later...Scott came home with a chocolate fudge cake today!  Just THINK of how many endorphins I'll get from that.

Better living through chemistry!

xx

trish

The Black Dog

Friends!

I haven't written in a while, and there is a reason for that.

Winston Churchill called his depression "The Black Dog".  It's been such a long time since I've seen my particular canine that I didn't realize it was here.  But it is.  I am depressed.

What this means for me is that life has no joy, no savor, no creativity.

I feel bleak.

Living is an effort and takes all my attention and effort.

I'm incredibly tired, yet I can't sleep, or my sleep is haunted by incredibly vivid and horrifying nightmares.

I'm confused and I can't find words, nouns, names.  It's frustrating trying to express myself.  I can't even compose a decent compound sentence, for cripe's sake.

At least I know what this is and what I need to do, and I'm doing it.  I've done it before.  But it takes time to get better, and I'm an impatient perfectionist.  I hate waiting, yet I must.

Winston Churchill said "If you are going through Hell, keep going."

I intend to keep moving.

Thanks for listening.

xx

trish